From the fiery forges of eternal badassery comes a merch forged in thunder and stitched with riffs so brutal they melt the faces of false kings: the one true MZZTR MERCH!

Thou shalt stride like a hell born paladin through the pit of mundanity, armored in comfort and anointed in brutality. The sigil emblazoned upon its chest screams louder than a goblin in heat and strikes harder than Thor's own hard dick.
Whether thou ridest into battle atop a flaming steed or simply slam ale in the bar of thine choosing, this shirt declareth:
"My soul is distortion. My blood is blast beats!"

So gird thy seething loins, thou heavy heretic. Claim thy merch, or be cast into the mosh pit of obscurity!

MZZTR Limited Edition BLACK front/back T-shirt $20

12 REMAIN: 5 XL, 5 L, 2 M…Get it while she's HOT. Once she's gone, she's gone for good.

Future you to your grandkids: “In the annals of your lineage, let it be recorded that this artifact is of MZZTR origin.”